Why AG chooses to be epic

What to do on this fine sunny day you ask? I think I will go kill some zombies after watching the Karate Kid movie to enhance my epic moves. Being awsome isn't easy, so I decided to be epic. My life is not an easy one. It is filled with people who are awsome, but I am only epic. It is my lot in life. Now, I'm gonna kill some zombies. Peace, I'm out. I'm Batman. *slam's coffee on table and walks away*